Last Tuesday nite my uncle msg me. He asked about my condition and my study. While msging with him, suddenly I felt so sad. I felt so guilty toward my parents. The whole time after being posted to paediatric, I’ve not yet study properly. I’ve promised to myself as well as my parent to do my best for this posting so dat I won’t repeat the same mistake again. But then I don’t know why I still can’t study. When I started to read the book, I felt so sleepy and later fall asleep. I’ve tried to sleep during the day so dat I won’t feel sleepy during the nite, but it doesn’t seem to work. I purposely woke up early in the morning to study, but then I still can’t study. I want to get back my rhythm of study dat I used to use when I was in matric. It had become my best study time in my life. I enjoyed the study so much. Eventhough I can’t get the whole rhythm, at least if I can have a part of it, it’s already enough for me.

I don’t want to disappoint my parent especially my dad. I know how much he put a hope on me. It has become his dream since long time to see me graduate as a doctor. After seeing he’s going thru’ all of the hardships esp. of what he’s going thru’ rite now, I really want to fulfill his dream and to give it as a gift to him. And, since I haven’t give any gift to my mum since child, I hope I can make it as a special gift to her as this might be the only gift and the last gift that I could give to her.

“Ya Allah wahai Tuhan Yg Maha Memberi Petunjuk, Kau terangilah hatiku. Permudahkanlah utk aku menerima, memahami dan mengingati segala ilmu yg diajarkan oleh guruku dan segala ilmu yg aku pelajari dan ulangkaji selama ini. Kurniakanlah aku daya kefahaman para nabi dan daya ingatan para hafizin.Ya Allah wahai Tuhan Yg Maha Pengasih lagi Maha Penyayang,  bantulah aku utk melaksanakan tanggungjawabku sbg seorang pelajar dan bantulah aku utk merealisasikan impianku yg juga merupakan impian kedua ibu bapaku.”